New Zealand Weekly Update #18

Last updated on Februar 28, 2023

20th of February until 26th of February 2023

Approximate reading time: 5 minutes

Lets get it started

What a week, what a rollercoaster. As I told you last week I felt pretty shitty the last days (and also weeks). I fell in love and I fell down. It was more like a truck rushing into my whole body. Because this kind of a relationsship started great, unique and special. And it felt amazing. But as I told you, after a certain amount of time, the person changed its behaviour. She started to change her way of treating me. She started keeping more and more distance. Started to make me feel uncomfortable. More and more. And the more I gave, there more distance was build up. And I started to doubt myself again. What was wrong? Do I need to give more attention? More support? More and more and more? Well, I don’t know the answer to be honest. Maybe it was too intense from the beginning on. Too much. Maybe the wrong time. The wrong place. Or everything. In the end, it did not work. For a certain reason, that will show up.
Eventhough it is hard for me to understand how and why all this happend eventhough I tried my best, I am trying to keep all the good memories, emotions and moments with this person in my mind.
Because it felt good, special and made a lot of my days in New Zealand.
Sometimes, we are not able to understand the people around us in total. They have their own story. Their own experiences. Their own concerns. Maybe they don’t want to be hurt. Don’t want to feel weak. Don’t want to loose control. And sometimes, they need to move on. They need to leave. Sometimes it is not about us why they are leaving. Sometimes it is about them as they feel more comfortable. Free again.
So there is just one thing we can do – keep going, being ourself and trying to appreciate the time we spent together and be grateful. For every single moment.

Brewster Hut and Brewster Glacier – a unique hike

As I was supposed to drive the person I talked about to the airport and things changed, I decided to make the best ouf of this day and I ended up with some friends hiking Brewsters Hut & Brewsters Glacier Hike. The hike itself (to the glacier and back) has an elevation of 1500 meters and a total difference of about 14km.

And what to say – leck. Bäm! This one is stunning. The view to the glacier, to the valley, to a lot of waterfalls, to the water and to the ice is just amazing. Unreal. Unique and absolut salutary!
The hike itself is quite steep, all the was up to the Brewster Hut. Fortnunatelly most of the way to the hut is in the shade, but you’ll feel your legs, I promise. You hike up a lot of forrest track, a lot of roots to cross, a lot of moss. The hut itself is quite small and you can stay overnight if you book early enough in advance. We had a short break and moved on, all the way to the glacier. Following diferrent stone figure signs and ended up at this beautiful area. And when I saw this amazing water in front of the glacier, I decided to go for a swim. Naked. To wash away the pain. To pure my soul. To feel alive again. To feel free and happy. Smiling. Fresh. New. And what to say – it worked quite well (and it was fu**ing cold – 3° Celsius).
And we have been brave enough to go into the ice caves and to be able to see it from the inside. Watching sunrays coming through the thin layers of snow into the cave is catching you. It looks unreal, it makes you stare at those spots and admire them. To breath in every moment. Every sound. Every little detail. Everything of this gorgeous area.
Loose your mind and have a look by your own! Enjoy!

After we made our way down back to the car, we stopped to pick up two hitchhikers, Lisa from Germany and Philippp from the Czech Republic and we had some nice talks with them. And after a short nap, some food and a nice shower we ended up at Kai Whaka Pai, playing card games and having a drink together.
What can I say? This was probaply one of the best days so far in New Zealand. As it was unexpected. Unplanned. Full of nature and good company. And full of „I am so glad I am here right now“ moments. So well, sometimes live can be good and sad at the same time. And it will go on…

What else to say?

BÄÄÄÄM! While writing this weekly blog, I received an E-Mail from the immigration center from Canada! And leck! I got the Port of Entry Letter (POE – letter)! Which means I am allowed to travel to Canada and to talk to an officer at the border. He / she makes the final decision if I am eligible receiving my working holiday visa (usually it works if you meet all the criteria, hold a valid insurance and have enough financial backup with you as well). What a great news! What a week! What a feeling!
And what else to say? I suffered a lot this week and I know that I will still suffer a bit from time to time about the experience I’ve made again falling in love and falling down. But in the end, it will be (and it already is) an important and good one. An experience that helps me to become a better version of myself. More attentive and mindful. And an experience that shows me that I need to be grateful for the time I have and had with people around me. And to keep the good memories in my mind. Being upset, angry or full of hate is not helpful, not right and makes your own situation even worse.

Have a great week, stay mindful and kind to yourself. Don’t give up, don’t doubt yourself to please others. Stay unique, special and make the people around you a little better 🙂

Your DingyInternational
Felix